Every successful relationship needs intimacy to thrive. Most people immediately associate intimacy with sex.  While that’s certainly part of it, it’s not the only way to be intimate with someone.

Intimacy in a relationship builds trust, improves your bond with your partner, and allows you to show vulnerability without fear of being judged or criticized.

Without intimacy in your relationship, it’s hard to feel like you can open up to your partner, and therefore you might struggle with communication issues. Those issues, in turn, can end up causing problems in your physical relationship, too.

So, what can you do to increase intimacy with your partner and feel closer than ever in your relationship?

Let’s cover a few tips.

1. Try Something New Together

There’s something wonderful about sharing a routine with your partner, and routines are important. They add comfort to a relationship and can help to reduce stress.

However, the possible drawback to an everyday routine is that it can diminish the “spark” your relationship once had. You can get so used to things being a certain way that you forget about building intimacy the way you once did.

One of the best ways to combat that is to try something new together. Take a cooking, dance, or art class. Travel somewhere different. Go to a new restaurant once a week.  Read a book together.

By changing things up and creating new shared experiences, you’ll build excitement in your relationship and feel closer to your partner.

2. Date Each Other

Speaking of going somewhere new each week, going out together is another fantastic way to increase intimacy.

If you’ve been with your partner for a long time, you might not go on dates as frequently as you once did, if at all.

While that is very common in relationships, it can be problematic if you’re not spending as much time together because of busy schedules, kids, work, and other distractions.

Schedule intentional time together each week. It might not sound romantic to “pencil in” your partner. However, doing so lets you both know that you’re making your relationship a priority.  Even if you only have time to schedule a 15-minute coffee date with your partner, it’s the intention that grows closeness.  When you’re focused on each other and having meaningful conversations, you’ll build trust, openness, and intimacy.

3. Be More Vulnerable

One of the best ways to increase intimacy with your partner is to be more open and vulnerable.

That’s often easier said than done.

No matter how long you’ve been with someone, vulnerability is hard, and it can even be frightening. You’re trusting your partner to be an active listener by opening yourself up. More importantly, you trust them to validate your feelings without judgment or criticism.

While vulnerability isn’t always easy, it’s necessary for intimacy. The more willing you are to be your truest self around your partner, the more likely it is that they will be vulnerable and open around you, too.

One specific tool that can help increase vulnerability is to purchase a couples or intimacy conversation card deck.  These prompts can promote deep conversation and connection, and you may even learn something new about your partner!

4. Be More Physical

Again, most people associate intimacy with physicality in a relationship. But that goes well beyond the bedroom.

Physical touch is important for building intimacy, but it doesn’t have to be sexual in nature. In fact, non-sexual touch can increase your intimacy even more and help you to feel more connected as a couple.

Things like holding hands, gentle back rubs, or even long hugs can boost intimacy in your relationship. Touch your partner without the expectation of things escalating further. You might be surprised by how much closer you feel.

If you’re struggling with intimacy in your relationship, it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong.  It simply means you need to re-prioritize each other.  Try these suggestions for increasing your intimacy with your partner, and you’re likely to feel closer and more connected than you have in a long time.

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